When you forgive, you will not be excusing the person for wrongdoing. Instead, when you are ready you will be offering a cessation of resentment and, as best as you are able at present, to offer goodness of some kind to him or her. ??You may or may not reconcile, depending on the circumstances. ??You do not reconcile with someone who could physically hurt you, for example, until you have trust that the person has changed for the better. ??The gist is this: You will be trying to offer mercy to the one who hurt you. ??You can take your time and move at your pace so that the forgiveness journey is not overly burdensome for you.